Blimey....he's a dangerous man. Domestic abusers cause deep, lasting trauma - and unless we're prepared for it (which no one ever is - let alone as a teenager) you can completely understand how people get manipulated, brainwashed and ultimately controlled by a fog of gaslighting and coercion. It's so important to talk about this stuff - especially with our kids to make them aware that this exists and what red flags to look out for - because they're always there, but most people don't know what they look like. (I think a family member of mine has been targetted and groomed by a man 32 years her senior since the age of 15 and it's absolutely terrifying). I am sure many many people reading this Ann will recognise behaviour like this and you sharing your story may help give them the courage to move on and get out. (although, - make a plan first and have someone with you! Abusive men like this can become incredibly dangerous when you try to leave them because they see you as property, not a person) Thanks for sharing your story Ann - you're awesome, I'm gutted for you that you ever had to go through this crap and if I ever met this guy, would happily let his tyres down for you!
1. Yes, when leaving an abuser never let them know and have a safe plan, whether to a friend, relative or women's refuge.
2. Teaching young people to recognise these, and how to support friends and family members as they hopefully leave and hopefully survive, is one of the most important jobs we as parents/extended family can do for our kids.
3. Hopefully I will never, ever, ever see this human again!
Blimey....he's a dangerous man. Domestic abusers cause deep, lasting trauma - and unless we're prepared for it (which no one ever is - let alone as a teenager) you can completely understand how people get manipulated, brainwashed and ultimately controlled by a fog of gaslighting and coercion. It's so important to talk about this stuff - especially with our kids to make them aware that this exists and what red flags to look out for - because they're always there, but most people don't know what they look like. (I think a family member of mine has been targetted and groomed by a man 32 years her senior since the age of 15 and it's absolutely terrifying). I am sure many many people reading this Ann will recognise behaviour like this and you sharing your story may help give them the courage to move on and get out. (although, - make a plan first and have someone with you! Abusive men like this can become incredibly dangerous when you try to leave them because they see you as property, not a person) Thanks for sharing your story Ann - you're awesome, I'm gutted for you that you ever had to go through this crap and if I ever met this guy, would happily let his tyres down for you!
1. Yes, when leaving an abuser never let them know and have a safe plan, whether to a friend, relative or women's refuge.
2. Teaching young people to recognise these, and how to support friends and family members as they hopefully leave and hopefully survive, is one of the most important jobs we as parents/extended family can do for our kids.
3. Hopefully I will never, ever, ever see this human again!